Its been a good day. It started off  lazy, Mavis spent most of the morning on her computer,while I  made the bed did the washing up drying and putting away I then hoovered. We took louis for a long round walk along the beach. She said  that I make her lazy by doing the  house work. But I did leave the mopping of the floor to her.

This afternoon she is restless because she is on a cleaning bender. Wardrobes and chest of drawers anything not screwed down all  have to be moved to get behind them for cleaning  cobwebs etc. I said  this wants a day set aside for this because its a bit of a job moving it all about.

At least  she is a lot happier today . That I like. I have been considering  Geraldines suggestion about a  special group for carers. I find that there are  considerable sites  already   for carers, So I  cant see that by me creating another one  would help. If anyone wants to  scream or shout  on this blog comments ok.  But to be honest I dont feel the urge to go down that road. We still have a way to go yet and I  cant waste precious moments getting angry . I may have time for anger later. But I feel that  when that time comes I wont be  putting it on here. Perhaps at that stage I will just shut up go sit in the corner and let the blog  fade until such time as I feel up to it again. Being angry doesnt help or improve the situation. Its not our fault this  has decided to choose Mavis. Its just part of living, sometimes we are not in charge of our paths in life. For me some 50 years ago when I worked in asbestos to earn wages to keep family together  I never thought that the wages for that would be to destroy the very thing I was trying to protect. Its done now and no amount of anger is going to change that. Im not saying that  I will  end up  taking it lying down. There will be so much pain for me. Pain I will hide from view,after all no one wants to see an open show of someones grief. I dont think I will have time to be angry. Im sure Mavis wouldnt want me to  waste time on it. So on that note its upwards and onwards, just another day to go  for some results. If they are not  forthcoming then you may just see some anger creeping in after all.